"American Recovery and Reinvestment Plan"

Yeah, yeah, I’m in a political mood today.

And when I’m in a mood to get really pissed off, I watch things like this – the latest “fireside chat” from the “Office of the President-Elect,” whatever the hell that is.

Lemme see: I’m looking it up in my pocket Constitution…Nope, can’t find that office. Ah, well. He’s the President-Elect, and no doubt he has an office. I had an office once. It was really cool. I had a great view of the parking lot, one of those toys you turn upside-down to see…well, that’s probably not what he means by “office.” Never mind.

Anyway, to The Plan!

“To create three million new jobs, more than 80% of them in the private sector.”

Never mind answering how he’s going to create the 80% of those new jobs. He can’t do that, and he knows it. He only hopes we don’t know it. It’s those other 20% that bother me. Do The Math.

“We will double domestic energy production and renovate public buildings to make them more energy efficient.”

The first is an old promise, made by every incoming administration, and we can safely assume it’s a lie. The second, if true, will cost money. Lots of money. Your money.

“To build a 21st century economy, we must engage contractors across the country to create jobs rebuilding our crumbling roads, bridges and schools.”

Which, if true, will cost money. Lots of money. Your money.

“To save not only jobs, but money and lives, we will update and computerize our health care system…”

Oh, my giddy aunt. Next time you meet your local doctor, be sure to say goodbye very fondly. “Your papers, please, Citizen?” An aside - I was really surprised when Hillary! became Secretary of State. I was expecting Health, Education and Welfare. Be that as it may, somewhere she's smiling.

“To make America and our children a success in this new global economy, we will build 21st century classrooms, labs, and libraries.”

Another old, expensive promise. Doesn’t say a damned thing about the way our Beloved Central Planners have already wrecked the curriculums of the Youth Indoctrination Centers, but I’m sure we can assume they’ll keep doing A Heck Of A Job.

And my personal favorite:

“And to put more money into the pockets of hard-working families, we will provide direct tax relief to 95% of American workers.”

Huh? How? Will he be financing all that other stuff from his left-over campaign fund? And – assuming a single syllable of any of this is true, (HA!) or that the above expensive promises are to be funded by taxes rather than inflation – god help the remaining 5%.

Oh, lord. God help us all.