From the "Really! Don't be on my side" Department...

Swallow all eating and drinking materials before starting either video at this link. TUAK management is not responsible for the safety of your monitor or keyboard.

What I learned from these videos:

* You’re 14 times more likely to survive a gunfight with body armor… but it’s heavy, so don’t wear it.
* Bullets go through walls.
* The Remington Upland Special is a state-of-the-art tactical shotgun cleverly disguised as a bird hunting gun. You definitely don’t want to be within 10 feet of one.
* When you draw a knife, try to hold onto it. Knives are not disposable.
* Rifles, on the other hand, are. If your rifle jams, throw it away.
* Bullets go through walls.
* Remember to go back for your rifle later so the “skinnies” don’t steal it.
* Balaclavas should be worn at all times.
* When people make fun of your AR-15, switch to your OTHER AR-15.
* Slings are bad because it is impossible to “run like a banshee” with a slinged rifle.
* If you can’t bear to throw your rifle on your 1970s shag carpeting, it is acceptable to lean it against your closet door instead.
* You can make a lovely ghillie suit out of Ace bandages and Post-It notes.
* Bullets go through walls.

May the Lord bless you all.