Our Moment of Culture

Once upon a midnight dreary
While I pondered, weak and weary
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore,
While I nodded in the hushing
Suddenly there came a rushing
As of someone slowly flushing
Water 'cross my chamber floor
Only this and nothing more.

Wearily I wished the morrow,
Vainly I had sought to borrow
Plungers to relieve my sorrow
Mops to dry the soggy floor
I slowed it down and nothing more.

Ankle deep in water standing,
Long I stood there, wheezing, panting,
Weeping, cursing curses no mortal cursed before!
As the mess was slow subsiding
My thoughts were strong to go a-riding
To dry my troubled clothes, perchance to find a liquor store
I jumped astride my motor scooter
A big black bird screamed, "Roto Rooter!"