Truth is stranger more idiotic than fiction...

In other news, The Onion gives up its domain name. "Screw it," said a manager who asked not to be named. "It's no fun any more. We can't even try to keep up."

# Since service monkeys may likely draw attention, the handler will be escorted to the physical inspection area where a table is available for the monkey to sit on. Only the handler will touch or interact with the service monkey.

H/T to Tam.