The Ultimate Answer to Kings: This just in from Minas Morgul...

They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."

I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.

It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.

The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

This just in from Minas Morgul...

The newest Nazgul, Elena Kagan, has just been confirmed.

Upon receiving the news, Ms. Kagan said ... well, she hasn't actually said anything since her nomination, has she?

So excellent news, as the government of our evil overlords maintains unbroken continuity! You are commanded to rejoice.

2 comments:

Tam said...: Damn.

Now the Supreme Court will stop being stalwart individualist defenders of the Constitution...; August 5, 2010 at 2:59 PM
Pat H. said...: Just one more nail in the coffin of the US government.

Secede!; August 5, 2010 at 3:07 PM