The Ultimate Answer to Kings: Oh Yeah, Baby!

They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."

I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.

It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.

The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Oh Yeah, Baby!

If I never hear Amazing Grace on the pipes again it'll still be way too soon. But I loves me some bagpipes, as long as it's something rousing enough to make me want to strip down, paint meself blue and go slaughter some Englishmen. And I'm not even Scottish.

I ~~stole~~ pass on this vital meme from Keep It Simple Survival.

6 comments:

The Grey Lady said...: Ummm very nice Joel, but I calculate that tune was about 2 minutes and 50 seconds toooooo long.; November 16, 2010 at 10:42 AM
Joel said...: Matter of taste, I suppose. You're not really obligated to listen to the whole thing, 'cause this is a free blog! 8^); November 16, 2010 at 10:44 AM
Anonymous said...: Love it!!!! (And I'm not Scottish either.)

I agree that "Amazing Grace" can be overdone, but I greatly prefer the pipes version to any overblown, over-embellished "pop star" version I've ever heard.

I know you're from my neck of the woods (SE Mich); did you ever go to the Saline Celtic Festival? They have a bagpipe contest as part of the festivities. A couple years ago they also had a musical group called the Tartan Terrors. You might like their stuff. (www.tartanterrors.com) :); November 16, 2010 at 10:51 AM
Mayberry said...: Ha ha! Thanks for the chuckle this morning. FREEEDOOOMMMM!!!!; November 16, 2010 at 10:59 AM
The Grey Lady said...: Never you flash yourself Joel I didn't, I learnt my lesson eons ago when I dated a fellow that regarded Piobaireachd was a near religion. :OP

Snap the wv is naging...wonder what it's trying to say??????; November 16, 2010 at 11:55 AM
MamaLiberty said...: As one of Scottish Highlander ancestry, "Irish" drinking songs are not high on my list of favorites for the pipes, but 'twas nicely done anyway. Didn't see "Amazing Grace" anywhere.

And it's all your fault that I spent the next hour listening and looking at all that other Celtic stuff!!!

I've only had DSL for a short while, and still get sucked in sometimes. :); November 16, 2010 at 1:30 PM