The Song in my Head...

I've no recording to share, which I know will come as a relief to some...

New Sins For Old
by Leslie Fish

Oh what's the use of this looting and pillaging
Slinging my raygun through blood, guts and gore
Raping and robbing and boozing grow boring
The life of a pirate, no fun any more.

No fun anymore, no fun anymore,
It's only a job, it's no fun anymore.

Always the same, all the planning and ambushing
Pouncing, attacking and hauling away
The whoring and boozing and passing out afterward
It's getting monotonous day after day.

Day after day, day after day,
It's boring as hell fighting day after day.

I've bounced in more beds than there's hairs on my you-know-what
I've bred enough bastards to crew my own ship
I've never had time to stay home and raise one of them
So what will I have when I've emptied my clip?

Emptied my clip, emptied my clip,
Who'll call me Dad when I've emptied my clip?

I've got an itch to go do something different
Get a good farm and a nice buxom bride
Raise some tall crops and a lot of fat babies
Complacency's one sin that I've never tried.

I've never tried, I've never tried,
Playing good citizen I've never tried.

One line in that song always gets me, because I can't make the claim. "Complacency's one sin that I've never tried." I did try it on, quite consciously, and stuck with it for almost twenty years.  It damned near drove me crazy.

I was underground from my earliest adulthood.  Never filed a tax return, never registered for the draft - never did a lot of "good citizen" things.  I went to shooting schools before it was cool, took classes in explosives, hung with people I sometimes found scary and usually ended up disdaining.  I was very serious about being an Angry Young Man.  I was really, really sure the revolution was just around the corner, and I wanted to be ready for it.

Yeah.  Uh huh.  Have a good guffaw.

Then, as I gradually realized I didn't even know where the corner was but it sure as hell wasn't anywhere around here, I decided maybe I'd had it all wrong.  Got a good job and a...well, a bride.  Had a kid.  Bought a house.  Got a better job and a bigger house.  Dropping in is a lot easier than dropping out, lemme tell you.  I've done it both ways.

I can't really regret dropping in, because I did get my kid out of it and I really love my kid.  But she's grown now, and I sure as hell don't regret dropping back out.  So playing good citizen is a sin I did try, really hard.  But I guess I'm just not the good citizen type.