The Ultimate Answer to Kings: She's only trying to help, GL!

They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."

I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.

It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.

The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

She's only trying to help, GL!

The Grey Lady links to these real world working mom tips from a lady who's done her research, interviewing Working Moms from Beverly Hills to - er - someplace else really exclusive; tips offered (I [snort] have no doubt) with completely serious intent, and has the nerve to snark! Can you imagine such gall!

My personal fave:

* Condense your spa appointments. For example, JB has a salon she goes to at the end of the day to have a facial, manicure, and pedicure at the EXACT same time. She's in and out in 70 minutes.

Hey! After a stressful day, that one has always worked for me. Of course my pedicures only take half as long as usual, so it's a natural time-saver.