The Ultimate Answer to Kings: We actually have conversations like this. Because I'm a putz.

They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."

I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.

It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.

The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

We actually have conversations like this. Because I'm a putz.

H/T to Jon.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...: I'm pretty sure most, if not all, people who live with dogs-'cause we don't really own them, do we?-have conversations like that.; May 3, 2011 at 3:00 PM
MamaLiberty said...: A--yep. My dog is 19 years old and getting senile, blind and deaf. But he's still got a firm hold on the reins.

Had my sons staying with me recently and they remarked a few times how the old guy has me so well trained. He makes a certain noise and I go to open the door without even thinking about it.

And, even though he is still annoyed with me if it is raining or snowing outside, he's finally come to the conclusion that I must be too stupid to actually do anything about it.

LOL; May 3, 2011 at 3:25 PM

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Tuesday, May 3, 2011

We actually have conversations like this. Because I'm a putz.

2 comments:

Why the hell did you scroll all the way down here?