Ohhhhh...Rich Food....

Yeah, excess indulgence in free food is not a good idea. I'm gonna go find a blackboard so I can make myself write that 100 times.

A typical breakfast for me is a pot of oatmeal, or maybe an egg sandwich. Because I eat what I store, my diet is generally very basic and rather bland. It's what I've grown used to. Because I rarely bestir myself to hunt, I'm basically a vegetarian; not by inclination, just by circumstance. Which is why rich food can hit me like a thermonuclear gut bomb.

It happened that I was just cleaning up after some oatmeal this morning when I got a call from my weekender neighbors, S&L. "Had breakfast yet?" The honest answer was yes, but...well, hey. Free food. I was planning to take the boys for a walk up their way anyhow, so let's go! Yum. French toast, sausage, spicy potatoes, watermelon salad. Gooood stuff.

And that would have been fine, except that I had also been invited to a neighborhood barbeque later in the day. Just got a ride back from that, because I didn't feel up to walking yet. Steak, bratwurst, potato salad, beer...you get the idea.

"Hey, Joel?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, hey, this is your large colon, dude. Just wanted to give you a heads-up. Is there a bathroom, like, very close?"

"Uh...yeah, there's one right over there."

"Okay, my advice would be to run in that direction. Now."

Sigh. Sure tasted good, though.