The Ultimate Answer to Kings: That went really well at Costco, as I recall...

They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."

I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.

It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.

The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

That went really well at Costco, as I recall...

H/T to Mayberry

5 comments:

Anonymous said...: Wal-Mart, the store that assumes everyone who walks through the door is a thief. Just another reason not to shop there...; December 7, 2010 at 12:34 PM
Kevin Wilmeth said...: I'm not counting on Costco either. Last I checked, their specialty was phone-in assassinations of armed patrons.; December 7, 2010 at 2:58 PM
Joel said...: Yeah, that was sort of what I had in mind, Kevin. :(; December 7, 2010 at 3:47 PM
jack said...: The ex-STASI must be really confused now...; December 8, 2010 at 7:15 PM
Phssthpok said...: Nightwatch.

Babylon 5 is starting to become more and more eerily prescient.; December 9, 2010 at 5:34 PM