The Ultimate Answer to Kings: Don't run!

They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."

I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.

It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.

The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Don't run!

If you run, they got to chase. They'll pull you down like a deer, boy. Turn and face'em. You got to be the biggest dog. Never run.

2 comments:

MamaLiberty said...: Oh shoot, he didn't fall down. LOL I have an 8mm film of myself and 14 black Labrador puppies - about two months old. They actually did knock me down and danged near drowned me licking me, beating me up with their paws and tails in their glee at "catching" me.

My husband (now deceased) just kept filming and didn't offer once to help... we were both laughing so hard the movie is a bit jerky, but it is still hysterical 45 years later.; May 9, 2012 at 1:58 PM
DonkeyBuster said...: As cute as this is, this would probably be a bad idea w/certain breeds which the microbrained among us like to use for "guard dogs", meaning any of the bully breeds & shepherds.

Sometimes I long for the days of my utter ignorance.; June 11, 2012 at 11:01 AM

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Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Don't run!

2 comments:

Why the hell did you scroll all the way down here?